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Growing up I always hated the question "What do you wanna be/do when you grow up" because I would always answer with "I don't know" or "I'm not sure". They would always respond with "Well you've got plenty of time". I hated this, I was the kid that would get a jump start on stuff that I believed would help my future and I still do. But not knowing what I want to do hurts just a little cause I can't get a jump start on nothing.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm a little above average at most things I do, but I never feel like a pro. I know that I'm going to do something great and be big, I just don't know for what yet. Maybe I'm gonna be an underwater welder. Who knows. I struggle talking to my parents about this thing as well because all the stuff I'm interested in they have no insight on it, but they still want to try and give advice. My mom believes in college in which I have not a lot of interest in (money mostly). My dad agrees with my on the not needing college to be great, however he is a trade school type of guy if not college. So how do I get around both of these.

I always loved pushing myself and seeing what I can truly do so this was my chance. I performed 2 nights and each night I didn't mess anything up, but little did I know that this isn't even the hard part.

This show specifically has pushed me beyond my limits, learning techniques, putting myself out there, learning 11 dances in a week, having to improvise (though I've had practice at this). It's taught me that I can do this and that I have a chance of going some where big in this industry. I'm not saying Broadway (those people are super talented and train like no others), but something big. I can do the training part and I also can do whatever I put my mind to. If I truly want something it will get done.

I don't actually know who reads these, but at the end of the day I just don't want to fail. I want to be able to make it on a big stage and say "hey look mom, I did it". I know it's kinda cliche and an overused line, but I truly believe in it. I'm not sure if my dad will ever really get it, but I know he loves me (they both do) and he'll be proud of me to. I just have to make it. There's a quote I heard this week that I'd like to share. "Never stop failing because the moment you do you've failed" I really like this quote because even when you succeed at something you can always keep going. The moment you stop it's all over though. That's it for today. cya.

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